I have created my own. The team consists of me, Nomar the 12 year old cat and Sierra the 15 year old blind dog. Why did I need this team? Friday night one of the back doors either got left open or at least enough ajar that in the morning it was wide open. Wind or cat claws must have forced it open. I didn't really think much of it as Nomar the cat was still inside. That is my only fear about the doors being open. . . WAS my only fear. Until now. When I went to put on my shoes I found that Nomar had left me a present. Two dead mice right there next to my shoes. Now Nomar has never been a hunter. He might play with something to death. He used to torture baby birds and moles when he was an outdoor cat once many years ago. Everywhere we have lived since then he stays inside so he doesn't disappear as he is quite skittery. So last evening I am sitting in the living room and I hear something. I look to see what it is and there is a little mouse chewing on some paper and Sierra is sitting there with her nose on it sniffing the mouse. It was totally unafraid of her. I am guessing it had hidden under the couch all day as that is where it went when it was disturbed. So anyway, I picked up the sleeping Nomar from his post on the chair and tried to let him be the executioner. I set him down and he whacked at it and it ran under the couch. Now is where my SWAT team was forced into action. I positioned Sierra in front of the couch. Her job was basically as a decoy. I put Nomar on the end with the most open space as I figured he had the best chance of a kill. I was on the other end. This is where Crossfit came in. I was lifting the couch with one hand and had a plastic bag in the other to try and catch the intruder. This went on for several rounds as the mouse went this way and that and I moved the couch and the animals got thoroughly confused. At one point Nomar had it and it was squeaking and crying. I said "good boy Nomar, kill it!." This startled him and it escaped. Next move was to wall it into a small area. I was moderately successful. I was able to get him in the open space. I made a dive. Laying out like a football player catching a pass. I lunged with two hands and brought the bag down on top of him. His beady little eyes stared at me in confusion. I grabbed him through the bag and tied it off. I will leave it to your imagination how I disposed of him. But. . . I caught a mouse. Cat quick!
The WOD:
1, 2, 3. . . 9, 10, 9. . . 3, 2, 1
Thrusters
Pullups
Dips
I think its the positioning of aging animals that makes me laugh the most. Its kind of like a board game, as they are no longer limber enough to make the charge themselves. Sit Sierra in its path, and Nomar on the opposite side, and you take the middle. Its the fact that you caught the mouse, not the cat. If you ever have a younger cat in the country (no poisoning issues) and you have a rodent problem, you can experiment with the 'wild-wow-factor' by decreasing what you feed your cat. Its amazing the system that gets turned on when you cut out the hand that feeds you. Its almost instant, you realize 'son of a bitch, the bi-ped isn't feeding me anymore. I better kill something and eat it.' I feel the majority of human species has had our hunting roots kind of bred out of them. Birds teach there young to fly and forage and/or hunt for food. Coyotes teach them how to get small game as individuals and large game as a group. Deer much the same. Humans teach their young to sit in front of box and become victim to a cycle of over-dependence. I am confindent if all we know ended tommorow, I could survive for at least twenty years. I am not part of a lunatic fringe of militia-men and doomsday preppers. I was just handed down generationally the ability to hunt if I so choose. I have even taken it as far as researching on how to produce primitive insulin. Its not perfect but it will work if it comes down to it. Insulin is one of the few hormones that can break the species barrier (pigs, cows, dogs, etc.). I guess that could be another challenge, as we should all be able to fish, and find indigenous plant life to eat.
ReplyDeleteImagine that, eat for a weak on only what you are able to provide with your own gut, grit and determination?
Awesome.
Jon
To be fair Jonny, Nomar had caught two mice the night before. Of course I think he is the one that opened the door and let them in. The kids probably left barely closed, as in "not clicked." He was scratching at it and I was yelling at him to knock it off. Now I know why. He was after the mice. It has been cooler here the last few days so they probably wanted shelter. Damn wimpy San Diego mice. It is 55 when it is downright cold.
ReplyDeleteI caught the mouse though. If I had to survive at least I know I could eat mice. They aren't very big though. I would have to go rat hunting. I bet you could raise them. We have loads of rabbits though and I am sure I could outsmart them with all the retaining walls. Either that or the old Bugs Bunny trap of a stick holding up a box and then yank it out. I would try it if it didn't freak my kids out. We ate rabbit when we were kids. I also had a pet rabbit. I am not sure how that works. Do you remember how mad Dad got when Bill and I shot those squirrels? Now he traps the damn things! Funny how you stop liking animals when they cause trouble for you. I had zero problems with mice as long as they stayed in their own territory. Once they came on mine I was ready to do battle. I suppose that is human nature though. We do it with other people too. Don't touch my stuff or its war. I figured it was an entertaining story anyway.
Spence would keep us alive for 20 years. :)
ReplyDeleteI love the story! Seriously funny stuff. It made me wonder what I would do. I think I would just let the mouse have its fun until the old cat decided to take care of things for me. Then I might pay John $1 to sweep the dead thing into a bag. Maybe after a year of Crossfit I will reconsider!
Who is the moron that programmed this for a Monday? I am suffering from the effects of a weekend of poor sleep and even worse nutrition. I went up the ladder to ten and that took me 21:31. I stopped as I was gassed and started worrying about my shoulder on the pullups and back on the thrusters. I was going 95# on the thrusters which is the Rx for Fran which is our benchmark for the paleo challenge. I will restart my watch and finish later, but have to get cleaned up and fetch my children. Damn. This should have been a Friday WOD heading into the weekend. I guess when I make my list of programming I don't pick the day that it will come up. Such is life. I will go back down the ladder later.
ReplyDeleteTuesday, 27 March 2012
ReplyDeleteColleen did this WOD as programmed and she said, "Gary sucks." I'll get her data from her later.
Candis and I did a different WOD because we knew we would get jammed up on the assisted pullup/dip machine.
3 RFT (Ca: 7:57; L: 9:28)
7 Hang Power Clean: Ca-75/65; L-55
14 Box Jumps-we subbed jump squats because we had to return the bench we stole
21 Situps
We'll rotate through all three of us this week. Now we know. . . .
It is killer. I might redo when I am in the groove. I might even bring my weights to the park as the pullup bar there is so much better. The iron gym really gives me shoulder fits. I don't want to get it cleaned up as that is too much down time for me, but every time it starts to feel better the Iron Gym kills it. I can barely lift it over my head. Each of the kids at Crossfit Kids "programmed" their own 3 minute AMRAP today and Drew and I did the WODS with them. The one with Shoulder Press was downright painful. Gwen programmed a 10 thrusters, 9 Box Jumps and 10 Crossfit Pushups. I got to through the box jumps of round 2, but I was dicking around trying to not break a sweat. I made 4 plus rounds on one of the kids WODs with 5 KB deadlift, 10 jumping jacks and 10 Situps. It was pretty fun. I was surprised Gwen didn't go for jump rope. She is getting realy good at singles, but struggles with DUs still. She does singles in reverse and also can do "crossovers" where you cross your arms on alternate jumps. I struggle with those, so I am impressed. She does annoy me at home when she practices while we are doing just about everything. Tessie and Ione have been being pills at the gym lately. I am hoping to get Gwen there without them when my parents are here. My Dad might dig seeing it. Maybe seeing his granddaughter doing it will get him to try it out. I think his knees would benefit greatly from some lunge and squat heavy WODs. Well, not heavy at first. . . ease into it. I am going to try and do a foundations class for he and my mother while they are here. Maybe I can talk him into the 6 AM class at the gym a couple days. Show him what it is all about.
ReplyDeleteWednesday, 28 March 2012
ReplyDeleteThrusters-45#
Pullups-6 assisted
Dips-6 assisted
30:11
Ooh, tired. . . .
Then I ate a box of Tagalongs. Curses.